“I can’t stand working on projects with him! He does none of the work and sucks up all the credit!” a young associate lamented to me recently.
“Sometimes the best career move is to hug the cactus,” I replied.
“Huh?” The young associate gave me an annoyed look, as if I had just squirted lemon in her eye. This is not an uncommon response, I must admit, when I try to be too quippy sharing my profound wisdom with others in the workplace.
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Years ago I was complaining to my own manager; I was getting bored with all of the administrative work and wanted to be assigned to something that utilized my creative thinking ability. She said “sometimes you have to hug the cactus.” And I think I gave her the lemon juice squint eye.
She went on to explain that by embracing the boring admin work instead of complaining about it, I was more likely to:
- Do better work on my current responsibilities.
- Apply my creativity to the admin work, perhaps creating value with innovative ideas to do the admin work more efficiently.
- Earn the right to work on something more interesting and inherently creative.
My manager used the “cactus” analogy a lot. Anytime she felt that I was avoiding or dismissing something (or someone) because of my discomfort or disinterest, she would often say “try hugging the cactus, you’ll be surprised what you might get out of it.”
Her basic premise wasn’t original of course. Others have touted the benefits of doing the difficult thing, working outside of our comfort zone, etc. Robert Frost expressed the sentiment more profoundly in his poem The Road Not Taken. But for some reason my manager’s “hug the cactus” comment stuck with me and popped up in my mind over and over again throughout my career.
Over the course of our lives, each of us is faced with a variety of cacti that, upon deeper reflection, we might benefit from embracing rather than avoiding. For example:
- The goal you’ve given up on because you tried to achieve it and have failed numerous times already.
- The abrasive colleague or boss you and others have learned to avoid whenever possible.
- The project no one wants to touch because it seems doomed.
- The job opportunity with a company most others would avoid because it is experiencing significant challenges.
- The relationship you’ve given up on because it has caused you great pain.
- The skill or capability you’re not working on developing because it doesn’t come easy or naturally.
Those are just a few examples. When you start to think about it, you will probably come up with numerous examples of cacti in your own life. Of course not every cactus deserves a hug.
The key is to be discerning, because some cacti will only cause you pain and grief. And when they hurt, those needles can dig deep. So think carefully at least give your instinctive response a second thought.
Regarding the young associate who didn’t want to work with a colleague perceived as a non-contributor taking credit for the good work of others, I asked her to think about the kind of work she would be doing with this person. Whether or not she received fair credit for her contributions, the kind of work she would be doing would build new skills, expand her responsibilities (and visibility in the company) and ultimately put her in a better position for the next significant promotion opportunity. As she thought about her choices, it became clear that “hugging the cactus” would be the best move for her.
Think about your own life and the activities or situations or people you instinctively avoid. Is there any upside potential if you lean into some of them rather than away? Maybe it’s time for you to hug a cactus or two.